In about a thousand years, archeologists will dig up tanning beds and think we fried people as punishment
Remember in first grade, when you were the leader and it was so aweseome?!
Whenever I text and someone is looking at my phone, I like to type "and this retard keeps reading our plans... should I take him out?"
For those of you that missed the end of the world a couple days ago, you can catch the repeat on December 21, 2012
I take you to be my lawful wedded text buddy. To have and to harass, In rich quotes and nasty jokes, Til dead battery do us apart
This is a serious question, listen very closely...
Do you know...
The muffin man??
I did an awesome job being born. I got a certificate if you dont believe me.
Toothpaste - Ruining orange juice since 1906
That awkward moment when the awkwardness gets so awkward it rips a whole in the space time continuum...
making it even more awkward.
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