Random Jokes #20

I love coco puffs, but i hate popo cuffs...

People please, there is a fine line between getting a real tan, and looking like you just rolled around in doritos

So I was at the park the other day, thinking to myself 'why is that frisbee getting bigger?'
... Then it hit me

'OMGz hav!n such a gewd tiem wif mai bestiez, lolzzz!!'
.... SERIOUSLY? TAKE YOUR KEYBOARD AND SMASH YOUR FACE WITH IT

My brother said onions are the only food that can make you cry...
That was before I hit him in the face with a pumpkin

FB status: like this if you like to like things you like :)

Is it just me, or does every great idea start with the word 'Duuuuuuuude!!'

I hate when people steal quotes from movies. It makes me angry, and you wouldnt like me when Im angry

I lost hope for America
when I picked up an American Flag that said
'Made in China'

Im paying almost 5 dollars a gallon at the pump while nascar drivers do 642 laps in a freakin circle just wasting it...

I finished a jigsaw puzzle in 7 months when the box said 4 to 7 years....
TAKE THAT JIGSAW PUZZLE MANUFACTURERS